January 9, 2011
OK, so I’m sitting here writing this, watching the snow
outside the window, contemplating the weather report that says we MAY get up to
8” of snow this coming week...wishing it was summer.
But, that’s not gonna happen anytime soon, so I thought I’d write about parties. Not birthday parties or New Year’s Eve parties, but BIKER parties. Anyone who rides loves biker parties. Whether you are a dyed in the wool old school biker or a biker wannabe, the biker rallies are a chance to cut loose, have fun, and not worry about what others are gonna think of you come Monday (But then, I never worry about that anyway, if “they” don’t like it, fuck ‘em!).
OK, so I’m sitting here writing this, watching the snow
outside the window, contemplating the weather report that says we MAY get up to
8” of snow this coming week...wishing it was summer.
But, that’s not gonna happen anytime soon, so I thought I’d write about parties. Not birthday parties or New Year’s Eve parties, but BIKER parties. Anyone who rides loves biker parties. Whether you are a dyed in the wool old school biker or a biker wannabe, the biker rallies are a chance to cut loose, have fun, and not worry about what others are gonna think of you come Monday (But then, I never worry about that anyway, if “they” don’t like it, fuck ‘em!).
THE PLATE FRAME SAYS IT ALL!
I’ve been to a bunch of parties, including the Biker Blues
Blast, Ritzville Blues Festival, Cowchip Boogie, ABATE Spring Opener, the
Redwood Run, Run 21, Sun n Surf, Testicle Festival, Doo-Wah-Diddy and the granddaddy of ‘em all, Sturgis. Some
were worth going to, some weren’t, and a few are worth going to again. Most of
them have the same basic things in common: topless women, wet t-shirt contests,
bike games, overpriced vendors, and “bikers” who tow their bikes in behind
$200,000 motor homes. So, let me give you my opinion (since this IS my website)
on some of the parties I’ve been to.
Ritzville Blues Festival: Technically, this is not a “biker” rally, but the town of Ritzville in Eastern Washington fences off the downtown core every July to host the Blues Festival. Jeff, Craig and I were going pretty regularly for a few year until the cost got out of control----we would head over on Friday, get settled into the hotel and head downtown.
Blast, Ritzville Blues Festival, Cowchip Boogie, ABATE Spring Opener, the
Redwood Run, Run 21, Sun n Surf, Testicle Festival, Doo-Wah-Diddy and the granddaddy of ‘em all, Sturgis. Some
were worth going to, some weren’t, and a few are worth going to again. Most of
them have the same basic things in common: topless women, wet t-shirt contests,
bike games, overpriced vendors, and “bikers” who tow their bikes in behind
$200,000 motor homes. So, let me give you my opinion (since this IS my website)
on some of the parties I’ve been to.
Ritzville Blues Festival: Technically, this is not a “biker” rally, but the town of Ritzville in Eastern Washington fences off the downtown core every July to host the Blues Festival. Jeff, Craig and I were going pretty regularly for a few year until the cost got out of control----we would head over on Friday, get settled into the hotel and head downtown.
MAIN STREET, RITZVILLE
Even though the official start of the Blues Fest isn’t until Saturday, it did not stop the party from kicking off early! A few hours downtown, back to the hotel (usually another party or 5 in the rooms!) and by noon or so the nextday, the festival was in full swing. If you have a bike, you get to park inside the fence along the main streets. Tickets to the “festival” are cheap enough ($38), with no less than 5 or 6 bands playing at any given time. There is a main stage set up in the middle of town, plus about 5 bars with live music
going all day and night. The local transit company runs a bus between downtown
and the local hotels for free (tips accepted). Unfortunately, the hotels in the area realized what a cash cow this was, and jacked their rates up---the LaQuinta we used to stay in for $50 a night is now over $100. But make no mistake, this is a party – lots of booze, great music, titties galore, and a police presence that is very cool (unless you get out of control).
going all day and night. The local transit company runs a bus between downtown
and the local hotels for free (tips accepted). Unfortunately, the hotels in the area realized what a cash cow this was, and jacked their rates up---the LaQuinta we used to stay in for $50 a night is now over $100. But make no mistake, this is a party – lots of booze, great music, titties galore, and a police presence that is very cool (unless you get out of control).
DOWNTOWN RITZVILLE, SATURDAY AFTERNOON
MAIN STAGE
CRAIG GETTING UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL
STEVIE RAY VAUGHN TRIBUTE
The Redwood Run: Held every year in northern California, the Redwood advertises itself as an “old school biker party”. And, it is. Held on private property outside the
small (tiny) town of Pearcy, the Redwood Run limits ticket sales, books
nationally known bands, and (thankfully) separates the tents from the motor
homes and campers. Lots of vendors, lots of great music, a river to cool off
in, and lots of naked bodies. The downside? It can be hotter than hell during
the day and colder than a well-digger’s ass at night, the highway patrol is all
over the place (even aerial patrols), and if you don’t get there at the butt
crack of dawn, the good camping spots (by the river or in the trees) are gone.
Tickets are not cheap ($130 in advance), and the scenery in the surrounding
area is amazing. If you go, be sure to ride through the Redwoods.
ALONG THE REDWOOD HIGHWAY
REDWOOD RUN CAMPGROUND
MAIN STAGE AT REDWOOD
WET T-SHIRT CONTEST
VIEW OF THE STAGE FROM UP THE HILL
EARN THOSE BEADS!
DOWN BY THE RIVER
Testicle Festival: Again, not strictly a “biker” party, but close enough. Held every year at the Rock Creek Lodge just outside Missoula, Montana; this party is probably the wildest and most decadent you will ever see. Definitely worth the trip, and Missoula is probably the most biker-friendly town I have ever visited! The
festival started in 1982 when Rock Creek Lodge owner Rod Lincoln decided to
have a party.
"I just wanted to celebrate the tradition of adulthood and fellow man," said Lincoln. "Let's just get together and have some good old fashioned fun…”
The first festival drew three hundred people, and 18
years later over 15,000 came to take part in "Montana's Mardi Gras."
This year, people from every state, 6 provinces, and 10 countries showed up to
Rock Creek! Plan on roughing it when you go---it’s tent or camper only, the nearest
hotel is in Missoula, about 20 miles away. Words alone will never describe what
goes on at the Testy Fest, especially after dark when the booze has been
flowing for hours and the inhibitions are gone! Let’s just say Jeff ended up
bidding (and winning) a pair of lace panties (no, not new) from one of the vendor
girls for about the same as a good steak dinner at the Keg would cost!
festival started in 1982 when Rock Creek Lodge owner Rod Lincoln decided to
have a party.
"I just wanted to celebrate the tradition of adulthood and fellow man," said Lincoln. "Let's just get together and have some good old fashioned fun…”
The first festival drew three hundred people, and 18
years later over 15,000 came to take part in "Montana's Mardi Gras."
This year, people from every state, 6 provinces, and 10 countries showed up to
Rock Creek! Plan on roughing it when you go---it’s tent or camper only, the nearest
hotel is in Missoula, about 20 miles away. Words alone will never describe what
goes on at the Testy Fest, especially after dark when the booze has been
flowing for hours and the inhibitions are gone! Let’s just say Jeff ended up
bidding (and winning) a pair of lace panties (no, not new) from one of the vendor
girls for about the same as a good steak dinner at the Keg would cost!
ROCK CREEK LODGE, MONTANA
WELCOME TO MONTANA
HOME SWEET HOME
THE NATIVES APPEAR FRIENDLY!
ROCK CREEK LODGE
HOPEFULLY SHE DOESN'T!
YUP, THEY'RE REAL!
LOOK, MA, NO HANDS!
JUST SAYIN' HI
THE NIGHT BEFORE...
THE MORNING AFTER...
Run 21: This is, by far, my favorite party ever! It is the one party I try to make
every year---held on private property 5 miles past the middle of nowhere
(Birkenfeld, Oregon), there is no cell service, no running water (except for
the muddy stream), and no cops. Birkenfeld is a small (tiny) town with a café,
store/liquor store/deli that must do 99% of its yearly business the weekend of
Run 21. Run 21 is sponsored and ably put on by the Southeast Portland chapter of ABATE, tickets are $50 each and limited to 2100. Live music is constant all weekend, some past artists have been Rick Deringer, Blackfoot, Pat Travers, Whiskey Creek, Foghat, Goldy McJohn (from Steppenwolf), and a ton of local bands that really kick ass all weekend (including one Black Sabbath tribute band that had Ozzy nailed!)!
Vendors are present as at all rallies, and the food vendors are even reasonably
priced. Biker games are a must, and this run has some of the best burnout
contests ever! The promoters even bring in the “Run 21 Girls”, a group of
Portland’s finest strippers for a couple of shows. Then there’s the wet t-shirt
contest!
every year---held on private property 5 miles past the middle of nowhere
(Birkenfeld, Oregon), there is no cell service, no running water (except for
the muddy stream), and no cops. Birkenfeld is a small (tiny) town with a café,
store/liquor store/deli that must do 99% of its yearly business the weekend of
Run 21. Run 21 is sponsored and ably put on by the Southeast Portland chapter of ABATE, tickets are $50 each and limited to 2100. Live music is constant all weekend, some past artists have been Rick Deringer, Blackfoot, Pat Travers, Whiskey Creek, Foghat, Goldy McJohn (from Steppenwolf), and a ton of local bands that really kick ass all weekend (including one Black Sabbath tribute band that had Ozzy nailed!)!
Vendors are present as at all rallies, and the food vendors are even reasonably
priced. Biker games are a must, and this run has some of the best burnout
contests ever! The promoters even bring in the “Run 21 Girls”, a group of
Portland’s finest strippers for a couple of shows. Then there’s the wet t-shirt
contest!
Sturgis: I have people ask me every year, “Are you going to Sturgis?” My answer is always the same---I’ve been there, done that, and probably will not go again. Not that
it wasn’t a blast, but there are too many other places I want to go and see. Nevertheless,
worry not my devoted readers; I will post my Sturgis story on here soon. Keep
watching!
Meanwhile, enjoy the stories, enjoy the pictures, and let me
know what you think! If you know of a run or rally that is worth going to, tell
me about it! After all, a good party is always worth the trip!
it wasn’t a blast, but there are too many other places I want to go and see. Nevertheless,
worry not my devoted readers; I will post my Sturgis story on here soon. Keep
watching!
Meanwhile, enjoy the stories, enjoy the pictures, and let me
know what you think! If you know of a run or rally that is worth going to, tell
me about it! After all, a good party is always worth the trip!
MORE PICTURES::::
